Response to “Your Gamete, Myself”

When I turned to this article and read the “Before You Read” box, I was surprised by my immediate answer to the question posed. I was sure that if I could not have a child, I would want to adopt. When I thought about why I felt this way, I initially believed it was because I would not want my spouse to essentially have a child with someone else. When I thought a little deeper, I found that the reason was even more selfish. I realized that I would not want my husband to be able to biologically linked to our child and have me be left out of the family circle. It would probably make me jealous and resentful. So to be equal, I would want to adopt. After reading the article and learning about other women’s experiences with adoption, egg donation, and infertility, I totally changed my mind. I recognized that if I were unable to conceive, using an egg donation would probably result in a more fulfilling and unconditional love for my child. I would have carried it, delivered it, and nurtured it and it would be a genetic product of the person I love, my husband. It would be as if the child really was my own even though no physical part of me was a part of the child.